When do you know you’ve come to the end of a journey? Is there a sign?
I think it starts as a whisper, faintly telling you that you don’t feel the same way you used to. And you hear it…but ignore it. Because the thought isn’t louder than your history with whatever it is that’s in question. You remain aware that you’re unsure if something is right but you give it time…maybe in a month or two you’ll feel differently. And sometimes you do! But sometimes you don’t.
I got an email that the fee for my rock climbing gym was going up by $3 a month next year. Small but it’s gone up about that much every year I’ve been a member, so…it’s really expensive now. Seemed like the sign I needed.
I just haven’t felt the same at all over the past 2 years. Climbing has been on and off because of the pandemic and I’ve had my membership frozen since September.
Part climbing with a mask on, part just not having the energy to train for ultras and climb 3x a week, part wanting to pursue other activities that bring me joy (including playing with my cat and this crazy thing called downtime), and absolutely part changes at the gym to guest passes and member rates.
So after all these years of climbing being an integral part of my life…I’m going to stop.
And maybe I continue in the future but for now, I’ll just appreciate what it did bring me, which was a lot of beautiful memories and some of the most important people in my life.
Good to get this off my chest!